You lil’ sissy

bigorexia-430

Image source: http://topsy.one/hashtag.php?q=%23Bigorexia

Today’s story is about a friend (who wants to remain anonymous) and his battle and growth with Bigorexia without even knowing he had it.

Everyone seemed to struggle with being overweight but I had the opposite problem. I’ve always had a healthy relationship with food but I had such a fast metabolism I never put on any weight. In high school it was fine up to the point where everyone started to hit puberty, everyone grew tall and broad, yet, I remained the same. I was never that tall to begin with and didn’t get blessed with the tall gene I always felt inferior in a way to the other guys at school. It didn’t make it any better since I was in an all boys’ school. I was constantly bullied for being smaller, people would yell “You lil’ sissy boy”, which I’m sure they were half joking when calling me names as boys do but it doesn’t really make them acceptable. I would never get picked during sports and I’d pretty much end up eating alone at lunch every day.

One day I decided I was sick of people thinking of me as weak and small I started to eat a lot more, what we would describe now as a “bulk” in an effort to gain some muscle. Then I found out in order to gain the muscle I had to work out, slowly I became obsessed with it, it made me feel…I guess masculine…everyone was noticing that I was getting bigger and it felt good. I began to add protein shakes in the mix then mass gainers, BCAA, creatine, beta-alanine, you name it I tried it. It became an obsession I would bulk then shred the fat, bulk then shred the fat and it was an endless cycle. I would spend endless hours at the gym, some days I remember working out for 2-3 hours at a time. At one point I even thought about using steroids. Eventually I got into university and made new friends, my confidence in my body went up so I started to gym less and eat more of the things that I wanted. I was in a more positive environment and that really helped. I never would’ve thought it would be considered an eating disorder, I didn’t even know bigorexia was a thing! It feels really surreal to look back on it and kind of scary, honestly, to experience the bullying and, as a guy, be forced to just take it.

IH

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21 thoughts on “You lil’ sissy

  1. A saddening realisation that not everyone has the same metabolism and thus will have to work harder or make themselves eat more than when they’re hungry to fit into what is befit as the aesthetic norm for males. Nice to see a different outlook on metabolisms/body types as girls seem to want the opposite of what the individual in this post desires.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Wow, thanks for sharing your friends story. I have encountered a similar issue with a fast metabolism and receiving criticism for my body because of this. Wouldn’t it be nice if everyone could be nice to one another rather than picking out perceived flaws. Great to see you’re sharing these stories to make people think twice before they comment on someones body type 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  3. It is quite sad that high school boys have to go through this stigma as well, mental health is very important for growing teenagers and they should be growing in a positive environment to feel good about themselves regardless of their size.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. A great example of turning your weakness into strength. Imo, should’ve stayed on with the gym but focused on being stronger rather than bigger such as powerlifting. It’s a favour to you on the inside rather than completely on the outside that you’re using your body to its peak capabilities.

    Plus less need for supplements and untested powerlifting competitions aren’t as well respected as IPF drug-tested comps.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. An incredibly powerful piece, I can say with certainty that I experienced a lot of the same during my time at highschool. Love the message in this post, and the message of your entire campaign! Keep it up with these awesome reality checks!

    Like

    1. Thanks, it’s so important to remind ourselves that in the end, we are in control of our mental health. We should be more supportive of our boys to make sure that this doesn’t still exist in high schools (or anywhere else for that matter).

      Like

    1. It’s often brushed off as “not a real disorder” but it can have very real effects on our mental health. It’s great to see that you are concerned enough to discuss these issues with him. Start the conversation early so that it doesn’t get any worse.

      Like

  6. yourbodyyourprivacy

    Thanks for sharing!! Think eating disorders are only suffered by females? We should think again. Men of all ages, backgrounds and sexualities can be affected by eating disorder.

    Like

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